Meet our CalmCon Speakers: Sabrina Ooi

CalmCon is coming up on 12-13 November - and in anticipation, we’ve interviewed several of our speakers so you get to know them a bit better. Today, we speak to Sabrina Ooi, CEO and co-founder of Calm Collective Asia. She shares more about her mental health journey, why she decided to set up Calm Collective, her hope for the future of mental health in Asia, and what she’s most excited about at 

Calm Con 2021. 

Tell us more about your background with mental health? 

I have lived experience of bipolar disorder (type II); and experienced several depressive episodes and anxiety.

While I had experienced depressive episodes several times from 11 years old to my early 20s, I experienced my lowest low in 2016, triggered by several stressful events (financial difficulties, loneliness, death anniversary of a close friend).

It was really hard to receive compassion and support for what I was going through, because of the stigma towards mental health, and the lack of understanding towards the subject. While I was able to share with family and friends that I was experiencing depression and suicidal ideation (I was desperate), I was met with responses like: “you’re just being dramatic/seeking attention”, “it’s all in your head, just sleep it off”, “don’t go to the psychiatrist, you’re not crazy”. 

Those responses made me feel incredibly isolated, worsening the depression. Devoid of hope and support, it led me to the 20th floor of a nearby building, legs hanging off the ledge, contemplating my death. While I sat, a passerby called the police and they came by. At that time, attempted suicide was still considered an offence in Singapore - so off to jail I went… but that’s a story for another time.

That incident prompted my parents to realise the condition was serious, and I managed to get treatment from mental health professionals following that. Soon after, I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder, which gave me the pathway to recovery. Over the next 3 years, I was focused on getting better: through regular therapy, daily medication, and changing my lifestyle by having a regular sleep schedule, practicing yoga, and meditation. And get better, I did! Since 2019, I’ve been able to hold down a regular job in the software industry while dabbling in DJing on the side, and fully take care of my own personal needs (rent, insurance, food). 

Through my personal experience, I resolved to find a way to help others find hope and confidence in their mental health journey. My first step in doing so was to write about my experience through this article on “How I Went from Leaving to Living” (written 9 Oct 2019). 

Publishing that was incredibly liberating and scary at the same time. Soon after, plenty of friends came forward to share their own stories too - and it made me realise it was the right thing to do.

Why did you decide to set up Calm Collective? 

I suppose the seed was planted around the time I released the article. I knew that through the sharing of personal stories and having open conversations, this would be the most effective way to de-stigmatise “mental health”, and the first step to giving one the confidence to seek help - before it’s too late. 

By the time Calm Collective was set up, my cofounder Alyssa and I had already lost two loved ones to suicide (her husband Tyler, and our friend Kal). In our catch-ups since, we both felt that Asia as a region needed more mental health content that reflected the Asian perspective (so that mental health issues are not simply seen as “just a Western thing”).

The Covid-19 “circuit breaker” in Singapore opened up the opportunity for us to start Calm Collective. I was personally upset that mental health services were considered non-essential, which meant I wasn’t “supposed” to see my therapist or psychiatrist. Given my mental health journey, it got me thinking about all the other people who would have really needed that help - especially given the stressful times. 

After a couple of quick calls and Zoom meetings with Alyssa and Luqman, we decided to go ahead with the first series of virtual events, focused on coping strategies for mental health -- and thus Calm Collective was born! 

Why did you decide to organise CalmCon? What are some of the challenges you’ve faced? 

We noticed that while mental health is being talked about a lot more, there's a misperception that's come up, i.e, "mental health is not for me, it's only for those who are struggling". 

Through CalmCon, we're seeking to broaden the mental health conversation; to educate our community that mental health exists on a continuum of good to bad mental health. It's not just about avoiding or fixing a mental health condition, but also for those who want to thrive (i.e. to have good mental health).

We want people to realise that we should all care about our mental health, the same way we do for our physical health. We want to be proactive in taking care of our mental health so that we can have the mental fitness and resilience to navigate stressful life events and uncertainty.

You’ve mentioned that you prefer to be called “Mental Health Expert by experience” - what are some of the most important lessons you’ve learned through your journey? 

That's a term from the UK healthcare system; where they've seen value in lived experience when it comes to providing mental healthcare and peer support.

I've learned that it's important to take a proactive approach towards taking care of our mental health.

Oftentimes, we start seeking help too late (akin to getting treatment at Stage 4 cancer) -- there's a lot that we can do before our condition gets THAT bad. For example, seeking professional help, and good habits/lifestyle choices (exercise, yoga, getting sufficient rest, eating well). 

What advice do you have for those struggling with their mental health & afraid of “coming out”? 

Have courage, oftentimes we judge ourselves more than others judge us.

I realised that in my own mental health journey, I've been a victim of my own self-stigmatisation as much as societal stigma. It stopped me from getting help for the longest time. 

Furthermore, you might even be pleasantly surprised in “coming out” - more people have stepped forward to share their personal mental health stories with me, and I know now more than ever that I’m not alone in this journey.

What can our audience look forward to at CalmCon? What are you most excited about? 

I'm really excited about our two new tracks: Thrive and Workplace Wellness -- I can't wait to present mental health in a fresh way for our audience.

On the speakers front, I'm super excited about having Candice Schaefer and Jamus Lim join us. Candice brings a lot of new perspectives from her global experience in managing employee wellness at Twitter. I'm also very keen to hear more about how Jamus has redefined failure in his life (elaborating on his LinkedIn post!). 

2 other talks I’m really keen to learn more about are the ones on “Work-life integration” and “Achievement vs. Contentment - how are they intertwined?”.

What’s your hope for the future of mental health/ wellness in Singapore and Asia? 

I hope that mental health conversations will no longer be taboo, so we can have the confidence to reach out for help and support without fear or shame. I also hope we can be more compassionate towards ourselves, and each other. Last, I hope that we can be proactive about taking care of our mental health, so that we can be our best selves in our personal and professional lives. 

Hear more from Sabrina at CalmCon, Calm Collective’s virtual mental health & well-being festival for Asia, taking place 12-13 November 2021. Make sure to head to calmcon.asia to get your tickets!