Beating the Sunday Scaries
Thanks to the pandemic, I've memorised every corner of my room, but it will always take an extra while for me to figure out what day it is. For some odd reason though, there will always be one day characterised by emotions I can’t dismiss. Sunday.
Since I was young, Sunday and I have always had a love-hate relationship. Sunday was a paradox. It held the satiating aroma of Chinese food with my grandparents, but also the bookish smell of reading assignments and Sharpie highlighters. Its soundtrack opened with horn honks in traffic but culminated with a Disney musical. To this day, that dance continues. For me, Sunday means writing thought-pieces, practising yoga, and attempting to be a one-woman band. But, it would definitely not be Sunday without the scheduled anxiety spell at the cusp of half-past-three in the afternoon. Unwillingly, I welcome my frenemy - the Sunday Scaries.
As the name suggests, Sunday Scaries refers to the feeling of impending doom as the brain registers it is about to plunge into another cycle of responsibilities. It’s as if freedom has a limit, and the countdown to reality starts. While I’ve always been plagued by these blues, I don’t think I ever dreaded Sundays this much until I started working. Fun seemed confined to at most 48 hours per week, because most of my time and energy was channelled towards work-related matters, including the hours spent worrying about work.
When I came across this Sunday Scaries playlist by Headspace, the meditation and sleep app, I learned to process my weekend anxiety in relation to the day-to-day. Starting the week with negativity only prompts that vibe to carry over to the rest of the week. At the same time, attempting peak happiness for the entirety of our weekend doesn’t necessarily stop the mid-week anxieties. What can we do then? One of my favourite songs by The Maine says “control what you can, confront what you can’t.”
With that, here are three ways I remind myself to live my days with a little less fear, and a lot more calm:
Accept and confront the present.
Nothing can change the fact that the next day will be filled with a new set of things to overcome. To let it go momentarily, I write down all my anxieties in my journal. For extra sense of peace, sometimes, I will even write down some of my to-do’s. But, I stop there and put it on a “tomorrow” list. I exercise self-discipline by not attempting to check them off in advance. I will acknowledge what I had accomplished in a day, and power through to conquer the new list tomorrow. Let go.
Get back to what makes you feel like you.
The fact that I can call my outlets and hobbies “mine” is a testament to how I can go back to them anytime. They will always be waiting for me. This is why I firmly resolve to make sure I do something I enjoy every day, even if that means watching one YouTube video to make me laugh. Every day, I schedule something to look forward to, and if possible, I cap off my day with that activity to end on a happy note. I spend at least an hour doing something music-related every day, whether that means producing a new song, curating a new playlist or just watching performances of my favourite artists on YouTube.
Identify at least one thing you are grateful for every day.
A daily gratitude practise helps me learn to shift my mindset away from dread. Truth be told, this is honestly something I am still working on, but at least I am slowly inching my way towards approaching my days with a bit more hope. I am more mindful of opportunities that come my way. Moreover, I learn to humbly appreciate the fact that every day is worth celebrating who I am -- alive, kicking, and still dreaming.