Turning imposter syndrome into your strength

Imposter syndrome is loosely defined as doubting your abilities and feeling like a fraud. It disproportionately affects high-achieving people, who find it difficult to accept their accomplishments and undermine themselves — many of whom question whether they’re deserving of their accolades.

During our very first in-person talk, “Turning Imposter Syndrome into Your Strength”, our panellists Dr Jade Kua, Dr Wan Rizal and Vishal Jain shared their experiences coping with imposter syndrome and how they’ve turned it into a tool to help them flourish. 

Here’s a round-up of important lessons from the discussion: 

You don’t need to be perfect

When asked about how imposter syndrome has manifested in their lives, Dr Jade candidly shared that she was conscious of what people would think when she published a children’s book on mindfulness titled “Goodnight, Marion” given that her children don’t even go to bed by 8 PM. 

Ironically, when she received an email from Calm Collective about Imposter Syndrome, she wanted to attend the talk - but then realised she was speaking at it! Dr Jade highlighted that we don’t have to be an expert or be perfect at something in order to do it — and in this case, it doesn’t mean she has to be a “perfect” parent to be able to publish a book on parenting. It was a great reminder that not everything has to be perfectly in place in order for us to get started on the things we are trying to achieve. 

The importance of changing your internal monologue and perspective 

More often than not, imposter syndrome comes along with constant anxiety and fear. Our speakers suggested that we start to see these thoughts and emotions from a different perspective. 

In particular, Vishal got us thinking that the anxiety and fear, although grappling at times, are actually the things that have gotten us to where we are today - as they lead us to put in hard work and practice. This view was echoed by Dr Wan Rizal, who shared that, while he doesn’t aim high, he is afraid to fail. He shared how he lives by his “50+1” of pushing himself to the next level. 

Recognise your unique definition of success and what it means to you

As the saying goes, “comparison is a thief of joy”. We tend to struggle with insecurity when we compare our “behind-the-scenes” with someone else’s highlight reel. 

Dr Jade reminded us of the importance of coming up with our own definitions and metrics of success. Do we define it based on being “successful” in relation to someone else? If we’re not like what we deem them to be, does that mean we aren’t successful?

Vishal shared similar views by mentioning that comparing ourselves to others and having a competitive spirit may be a good way to improve but often comes at the cost of our mental health. He also shared that there are often many more factors at play when it comes to the end result. Focus on the facts and own your hard work. 

Dr Wan Rizal also agreed by highlighting that life is not about the endpoint or the KPIs. Rather, it’s about the journey. We need to be able to look beyond the endpoint and enjoy being in the now.

In conclusion, when reframed, imposter syndrome can be looked at as a strength rather than a weakness. Aside from it being an acknowledgement of your ability, it also means that you’re self-aware enough to know the areas that you need to improve upon. Awareness is half the battle won - and with that awareness, there’s a higher chance of acting in the right way. 

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